Wait I'm gonna mumble meta about this because nobody's here to tell me to shut the fuck up.
Basically I think it's incredibly telling that, even back in Apo when Avicebron was entirely dedicated to his goal of completing Adam and creating Paradise, he never actually intended to be part of that Paradise himself.
The reason he was pierced by Archer of Black’s arrow with practically no resistance is partly due to his weak physical strength, but also he had already resolved himself to become nourishment for “Adam”. Fighting alongside a Master who respected him didn’t feel bad to him at all, but even so, he couldn’t defy the temptation of to have his wish, which he had devoted his entire life to, finally within reach. And he simply thought that he should pay reparations for that choice. For Avicebron, his own life was worthless in his eyes. To put it more accurately, the moment his Noble Phantasm was completed, he logically concluded that his value had become zero.
In other words, though he desperately wanted salvation for his people and for humanity in general, he never really considered himself worthy of that same salvation. Given his wording and description of Adam, I feel like Keter Malkuth's ultimate goal wouldn't have been the complete annihilation of mankind, but rather a selective pruning -- it's hard to tell what exactly the standards would be for which people are spared, but maybe anyone who doesn't make (aggressive?) contact with Adam in the first place would have been deemed worthy of remaining in peaceful Paradise?
Also, maybe before he carried out the actual step of reducing Roche to mulch, he might have considered himself worthy? Though I feel like that's not the case, either ... Even before taking that final step, he must have been aware of his own desires to betray Roche, and I think for someone as misanthropic and hateful of humanity's follies as him, he would have disqualified himself from Adam's salvation. It's not like Avicebron is a particularly disloyal person in the first place; the material book describes him as "basically loyal to his Master," and his relatively good relationship with Roche is described in fairly genuine terms. Which means he always would have been aware of how despicable the thought of betraying Roche would have been, and it's hard to imagine him making excuses to save himself.
So, though one can argue that his sacrifice of Roche was selfish (on top of obviously being incredibly callous and cruel), it's hard to really call it self-serving.
The contradiction between Avicebron's misanthropy and his devotion towards paradise is kind of ... sad, in the first place. His hatred of humanity seems like one that stems from experience and knowledge, rather than a fundamental one -- he's Seen Some Shit, he's always been at conflict with the people around him, his illness made it difficult for him to forge easy connections with people around him, and his murder was spurred by really petty motives, etc. If historical events are also included, he lost his innocent patron/benefactor to a greedy political assassination and spent much of his life wandering aimlessly. In which case, his general distaste for people is almost understandable. But he still values humanity's potential above all else (because he's deeply religious and considers humanity to be His creation, ultimately to be loved and respected) and would sacrifice anything, including his own life and morals, towards that end ... but not really counting himself among the people worth saving. In general, he seems to have always disliked honor and recognition and attention, and found no value in his own life beyond what he could do in service towards the salvation of humanity.
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Basically I think it's incredibly telling that, even back in Apo when Avicebron was entirely dedicated to his goal of completing Adam and creating Paradise, he never actually intended to be part of that Paradise himself.
From the Fate/Apo materials book:
In other words, though he desperately wanted salvation for his people and for humanity in general, he never really considered himself worthy of that same salvation. Given his wording and description of Adam, I feel like Keter Malkuth's ultimate goal wouldn't have been the complete annihilation of mankind, but rather a selective pruning -- it's hard to tell what exactly the standards would be for which people are spared, but maybe anyone who doesn't make (aggressive?) contact with Adam in the first place would have been deemed worthy of remaining in peaceful Paradise?
Also, maybe before he carried out the actual step of reducing Roche to mulch, he might have considered himself worthy? Though I feel like that's not the case, either ... Even before taking that final step, he must have been aware of his own desires to betray Roche, and I think for someone as misanthropic and hateful of humanity's follies as him, he would have disqualified himself from Adam's salvation. It's not like Avicebron is a particularly disloyal person in the first place; the material book describes him as "basically loyal to his Master," and his relatively good relationship with Roche is described in fairly genuine terms. Which means he always would have been aware of how despicable the thought of betraying Roche would have been, and it's hard to imagine him making excuses to save himself.
So, though one can argue that his sacrifice of Roche was selfish (on top of obviously being incredibly callous and cruel), it's hard to really call it self-serving.
The contradiction between Avicebron's misanthropy and his devotion towards paradise is kind of ... sad, in the first place. His hatred of humanity seems like one that stems from experience and knowledge, rather than a fundamental one -- he's Seen Some Shit, he's always been at conflict with the people around him, his illness made it difficult for him to forge easy connections with people around him, and his murder was spurred by really petty motives, etc. If historical events are also included, he lost his innocent patron/benefactor to a greedy political assassination and spent much of his life wandering aimlessly. In which case, his general distaste for people is almost understandable. But he still values humanity's potential above all else (because he's deeply religious and considers humanity to be His creation, ultimately to be loved and respected) and would sacrifice anything, including his own life and morals, towards that end ... but not really counting himself among the people worth saving. In general, he seems to have always disliked honor and recognition and attention, and found no value in his own life beyond what he could do in service towards the salvation of humanity.
Pathetic. :')